The Most Beautiful Thing That Ever Was
by itabitaboo
Summary: After everything has happened, we are left wondering what Nezumi and Shion's relationship has become. Nezumi has always teased Shion about being naively moronic, but what if Shion ends up teaching Nezumi a thing or two about the matters of the heart? And what about the way in which he presents his lesson? (AU but kinda canon too. One-shot.)
1. The Most Beautiful Thing That Ever Was

**A/N:** First ever writing in this fandom, but I ship this pair like no tomorrow xD I hope it's alright. I hope that the characters are okay. They were supposed to be canon, but I wanted to portray Nezumi as less self-centered and Shion as less of an airhead too. So I guess they are kind of AU characters, since they're not meant to be _entirely_ canon. They're also not meant to be crazy OOC either though. The characters are more geared toward their anime selves but everything else is from the manga, so it's like a mixed universe where the characters have a spin on them. Whatevz. Enjoy it anyway.

**SPOILER ALERT**: If you haven't read the first chapter of watched the first episode, then you'll be spoiled in the first paragraph LOL But seriously, there are no spoilers for big plot things. If you can't stand knowing even the tiniest of things in advance, like where his mother works or a line from a conversation they once had, then don't read this until you are current. If the little things that you won't even notice or that don't really make a huge difference don't matter to you, then read on in safety.

**Warnings:  
****—**It's not a full lemon, but it's citrus for sure.  
—Nudity, profanity, & a tid bit of violence.  
—Yaoi, meaning man groin to man groin and even man groin to man butt. It's gay up in hurr.

* * *

**The Most Beautiful Thing That Ever Was**

Nezumi walked along the beaten dirt path of the market quietly, gazing dispassionately at the dismal surroundings on his way home from the theater. He paused at a booth along the way and scanned the area for something that Shion would like. In such an impoverished place, though, there wasn't much that a spoiled brat from No. 6 would like. Although, Shion was unlike most people. He would be happy with a jar of dirt. All you had to do was tell him it had some special sentimental value... or even magical powers. Nezumi snorted. Shion would probably believe that too.

_"I want to be treated as your equal!"_

Nezumi's smirk dropped as those words cycled through his brain. No, Shion wasn't that stupid. He was naive, yes. He lacked common sense, but that was just because he had never been subjected to this sort of living before. In No. 6, one was never forced to face the situations that you'd face out in West Block. Plus, even if he did come from one of those genius schools, they really only taught their students things that they deemed worthy. They left out everything important; and, of course, they left out the important factor of _free will_ too. So Shion lacked a lot of knowledge, but he wasn't stupid.

He wanted to be treated as Nezumi's equal, so shouldn't Nezumi have the courtesy to give him a chance? Shion had proven himself in a bunch of situations so far, even if he had failed in just as many. Nezumi failed sometimes too though, so he couldn't judge Shion based on those failures alone. To be fair, Shion still needed some time to acclimate to this type of life and to learn the kind of common sense you needed out here before Nezumi could judge him on his actions. That was right. Nezumi had to give Shion a chance to prove that he truly could stand as his equal. Shion couldn't prove that if Nezumi kept writing him off as an idiot.

He was still simple-minded no matter what though, and a jar of dirt would still probably do the trick. Nonetheless, Nezumi wanted to bring him something that he'd really like. Deeming that booth unworthy, Nezumi sauntered along to the next shop, a thrift shop. He paused for a moment to glance at the garments that he could see. He continued on though, deciding that he had no idea what Shion would even like. As he walked leisurely along, he tried to think of something that Shion had already expressed any sort of interest in.

Well, he knew that Shion liked pie, particularly his mother's, but Nezumi wasn't sneaking into No. 6 just to get Shion his favorite pie baked fresh right from his mother's bakery. That was stupid. But there was no way he'd find anything up to par around these parts. He figured he'd stick on the track of sweets though. If he liked pie, then maybe Shion liked chocolate too. Nezumi grinned. Of course. That was perfect. Chocolate. And he knew just the place to get it. Chocolate wasn't a ready commodity around here. If you didn't know the right people, it was a luxury you couldn't acquire. Luckily, Nezumi knew the right people. Well, he knew practically everyone and his bribing skills were infamous. He turned a corner and hurried down an alleyway toward his destination.

"Eve?" an unfamiliar voice inquired from behind him upon turning another corner. "Is that you?"

Nezumi sighed but put on a kind expression anyway. He turned around with the smile he always associated with his character. "And what if it's not?" he asked lightly, though his insides churned at the sight of the big, burly man now towering over him. He vaguely wondered if he should be expecting a struggle. Fans of this man's stature always had some sort of complex, assuming that they had some right to Nezumi's body or something.

"It's definitely you," the man said confidently. "I'd know that figure anywhere."

Nezumi narrowed his eyes slightly, but kept up an airy quality to his movements and tone. It would be best to keep the conversation civil. "Well, I'm flattered," he replied. "I'll have to pay you some special attention next time you come to show then, since you're such a good fan. I'll give you a shout out or save you a special seat."

The man grinned lecherously. "Or you could give me some special treatment now," he suggested, sidling closer.

Nezumi shifted away, creating a noticeable distance between their bodies, an unmistakable gesture. "Sorry to disappoint, but I don't provide that sort of service," he said as politely as possible, smiling kindly.

The man abruptly grabbed Nezumi's arm to keep him from shifting away any further. "Excuse me?"

Nezumi wasted no more time to further explain himself, for he felt that his actions had been awfully clear thus far. He quickly took the man out at the knees and delivered a sharp elbow to his face, slipping out his knife in the midst of it all. As soon as the man hit the ground, Nezumi was upon him. With Nezumi's knife flush against his throat, the man swallowed thickly. He peered up fearfully, taking in Nezumi's no-nonsense expression.

"I said, I don't provide that sort of service," Nezumi repeated crisply. He cocked an arrogant brow. "If I didn't have things to do, you'd be dead," he assured shortly before calmly standing and simply walking away, leaving the man to lay in shock on the ground where he'd fallen.

Nezumi went about his business of buying Shion's gift quickly, opting to purchase both dark, milk, _and_ white chocolate for the price of just one. Ironically, he used his charm as Eve for that task, a charm that suggested he did, indeed, provide the type of service that the man in the alley had demanded. It was fine to insinuate those kinds of things with such scrawny men as the one who owned the shop he had visited though. This man was a huge fan and just one searing gaze from Eve would have him practically throwing his goods at Nezumi's feet. However, chocolate was one of those luxuries that no one ever saw around these parts. In the end, Nezumi had to get a bit creative, as he wasn't going to spend so much money on just chocolate.

This shop owner was no threat though. He would never actually seek Nezumi out for the services that Eve's demeanor implied he would offer. The people like the man in the alley were the ones that Nezumi had to look out for. Of course, he could protect himself against anyone. That didn't mean he could be downright careless though. He chose his words wisely with everyone that he spoke to.

Gift in pocket, Nezumi hurried home eagerly. It wasn't like him to skip back home to enthusiastically show Shion his treasures, but he couldn't help it if he was a bit excited to present Shion with his gift anyway. Admittedly, it felt kind of nice to have someone to treat sometimes. Plus, he loved that look of wonder that Shion would get in these kinds of situations. That innocence was what Nezumi liked about Shion the most. Even though he had been handed everything for his whole life, he could still manage to treasure even the tiniest of things.

When Nezumi finally arrived home, he could hear Shion humming from somewhere behind a bookshelf. "Welcome home, Nezumi!" Shion promptly called out.

"Yeah. Thanks," Nezumi replied, taking off his jacket and scarf. He plopped down on the sofa and kicked his shoes off.

Shion peeked out from a space in between some books, grinning widely at Nezumi. "How was work today?" he asked.

Nezumi shrugged and Shion disappeared again. "It was alright, I guess," he replied. "I got you something on the way home," he added, smirking when Shion reappeared, eyes wide with curiosity.

"What is it?" Shion asked, carelessly, and yet so carefully, dumping all the books he had been organizing in a corner and hurrying over to the sofa to sit down beside Nezumi.

"It's in my jacket," Nezumi said, reaching over and retrieving the article of clothing. Shion buzzed with anticipation as Nezumi retrieved the mystery item from the inside pocket.

"Ahhh~!" Shion sighed happily. "Chocolate!" He gratefully accepted the packs and jumped to his feet. "If only we had strawberries too. Then I could melt it and decorate them!"

Nezumi frowned slightly. "If I had known—" he began.

"No!" Shion interrupted quickly. "It's good this way too!" he assured, nodding his head earnestly.

"Well," Nezumi began, "you'd better cherish it. It was a damn hassle to get."

Shion cocked his head curiously to the side. "Why is that?" he asked.

"It's not easy to get things like chocolate around here," Nezumi informed. He placed both hands behind his head and leaned back, sighing and closing his eyes. "Plus, the journey to the shop wasn't all that appealing either," he added nonchalantly.

Shion furrowed his brows. "Why not?" he asked. "Did something happen?"

Nezumi scowled slightly. "A fan cornered me and... well... you know," he replied.

"Hm..." Shion hummed, thinking hard for a moment. "Asked for an autograph?" he eventually supplied questioningly.

Nezumi opened his eyes just to roll them. "Shion," he said dully. He paused, waiting for Shion to catch on. When that look of ignorance only intensified, Nezumi sighed and explained. "He wanted... you know... what that prostitute wanted from you when you first got here. Remember that?"

"How could I forget?" Shion said, his face crumpling with dismay as he remembered the event. After a moment, the information actually sunk in though. "Wait," he said. "You mean..." He trailed off and raised a suggestive brow.

Nezumi closed his eyes again. "Yep," he confirmed. "It happens all the time, but it still ticks me off. I'm not a whore, and yet they act like I am. And, what's worse, like I'm their _personal_ whore or something," he said casually.

It took a few moments for him to realize that Shion had gone dead silent. He did, however, eventually crack an eye to peek at Shion, who was staring off into space. "Shion?" Nezumi asked, but there was no response. Nezumi shifted to sit up straight. "Shion?" he repeated, reaching one hand out and lightly shoving the man's leg. Finally, Shion stirred. He shifted on his feet and fixed his gaze on Nezumi once again, but it was not as soft or innocent as it had previously been.

"Who was he?" Shion asked in a unsettling tone.

Nezumi would have rolled his eyes any other time, but this was not the occasion for that. That was a look that Nezumi recognized. It was a look that he despised. "Shion..." he began warily.

"Tell me who he was," Shion insisted, perhaps a bit more aggressively than intended. "How... How dare they... How dare anyone..." He trailed off and stared back into space again, his expression growing significantly harder and more disturbed by the second.

Nezumi shifted uncomfortably on the couch. "Shion, it's no big deal," he said.

Shion snapped his eyes back to Nezumi, intending to snap out an angry retort as well. When he caught Nezumi's eye though, he was unable to speak the harsh words on the tip of his tongue. There was a silent plea in that gaze. _Don't do that, Shion. Come back, Shion. I never want to see you that way again, Shion._ This type of attitude was supposed to be reserved for Nezumi. Shion wasn't supposed to get angry like this. Nezumi was supposed to be the one to do all the dirty stuff and to feel all the negative things. Shion was supposed to be light and airy, to counterbalance Nezumi.

Shion turned away and leaned his forehead against the nearest clear space on the wall to cool his rising temperature. He balled his fists at his sides as he tried to relocate his humanity once more. He felt insanity pulling at his mind though. He felt as if he could walk out into the street and murder a thousand people right then just to protect what innocence Nezumi still retained. It felt like a fruitless battle, this struggle for control. It felt like a battle he couldn't win. If he succumbed to such a terrifying side of himself, then he was just exactly the type of person that he never wanted to be. If he pushed that side away, though, then was he really fit to be at Nezumi's side? If he couldn't even do so much as defend Nezumi's honor, then what _could_ he do? Nezumi would never see him as an equal then. He just couldn't win, and that was driving him even madder. He was sure that his eyes must have taken on a wild quality by then. He must have looked like a lunatic.

He balled his fists even more tightly. Nezumi had said that he never wanted to see Shion this way. If Shion couldn't even maintain control over this strange anger within him, then he couldn't even look at Nezumi again, not with these eyes. The eyes that Nezumi deserved were soft. These were the eyes of hatred, and Nezumi hated them this way. Shion placed his palms flat against the wall and slumped over, lowering his head even further in shame so that it dragged down the wall a couple of inches. If he couldn't get control of himself, then he didn't know what he would do. It just seemed so impossible though. Someone had to pay for defiling Nezumi. Someone had to pay. _They just had to_.

"Shion," Nezumi said softly from his new position behind the man, touching his shoulder gently and plucking him from his dark reverie. "I'm okay, so calm down." Shion managed to exhale a shuddering breath. '_Yes. That's it,_' he thought to himself. '_Breathe. Just like that. Yes. Think of Nezumi. Think of his hand, his presence behind you. Calm down. Clear your mind. Do it so that you can face him again._' Nezumi rubbed the spot where his hand rested on Shion's bare skin slowly. "I'm okay," he repeated. Shion continued to take deep breaths. Slowly, he felt peace coming back to him. That was, of course, until he felt Nezumi's body press against his back.

It wasn't that he minded Nezumi touching him, especially if Nezumi was actually _hugging_ him instead of doing something not so kind or gentle. In fact, he liked that Nezumi was holding him so gently. No! He _loved_ it. What tripped him up was not the way that Nezumi's cheek rested against Shion's back so that his hot breath brushed against the skin there, or the way that his one hand had slid down to gently cup Shion's bicep, or even the way he had pulled himself right up against Shion's back. All of that was perfectly manageable for Shion. It was the hand that decided to come to rest on Shion's stomach, the way that it rested in such a precarious position so low on his abdomen, the way that it sent rushes of warm blood down in that direction. _That_ was a whole other story.

Shion had only just barely been able to come to terms with his own feelings. So he hadn't yet _told_ Nezumi that he was, more or less, in love with the man. Although, he did think that it was pretty damn obvious. In any case, Nezumi had no way to know that his actions would affect Shion so seriously. Nonetheless, Shion was _not_ equipped to deal with the situation at hand at all. No, it wasn't the situation. It was just that _damn hand_.

"Are you okay now?" Nezumi asked quietly.

Shion nodded slowly. "Yes," he replied.

To Shion's surprise, Nezumi didn't retreat. Instead, he asked, "Do I have to let you go?"

Shion paused to think of what he should say in response. The answer was a resounding "hell no", but he didn't want to give himself away too easily. "Not if you don't want to," was eventually his quiet answer. "You can do whatever you want." He could feel Nezumi's lips pull into a smile against his skin.

"Whatever I want?" Nezumi asked in a low voice.

God, that was sexy. Shion nodded. "Yeah," he affirmed, though his voice may have grown a bit shaky.

Ugh! Why didn't he just tell Nezumi to let him go? He obviously couldn't handle this kind of contact, if the ever-raging bulge in his pants was any indication. Thank god he had gotten so far as putting on pants after that shower he had taken, even if he didn't bother putting on a shirt. If he had been clad in just his boxers right now, there would have been _nothing_ left to the imagination. And, of course, there was nowhere to hide in this tiny room. So what the hell was he gonna do to get rid of his problem when Nezumi finally did stop arousing him and let go? He could already feel the pressure building in his stomach. It was already getting a bit painful too. He couldn't help it if he was so hopelessly attracted to Nezumi though. So when Nezumi's hand began to wander, Shion very nearly jumped out of his skin. There was only so much that a man could take, after all.

"Even this?" Nezumi asked as he rubbed slow, gentle circles into Shion's stomach, circles that steadily traveled lower.

Shion swallowed thickly and cleared his throat quietly, just to be sure that his voice wouldn't crack. "If that's what you wanna do, I guess it's fine," he answered as easily as he could manage.

Nezumi's hand came to a stop at the button of Shion's pants and his fingertips slid ever so slightly beneath the hem to rest against the skin there, successfully causing Shion's stomach to do olympic flips. "And if this wasn't enough to please me?" he asked in a hushed tone.

A cloud of haze fought to fog up Shion's brain. Had the air in the room gotten thinner? Nezumi was always taking him for an idiot, but Shion definitely wasn't _that_ oblivious. "What are you trying to say to me, Nezumi?" Shion asked, wanting to understand the man's intentions crystal clearly before getting too excited. He kept his voice quiet though, as if speaking too loudly would be too harsh and scare Nezumi's mood away. And that was a scary thought indeed, considering he welcomed this mood with open arms.

Nezumi snorted lightly and then skillfully unbuttoned Shion's pants with one hand. As he was working the zipper down, whilst Shion fought off a mental breakdown, he leaned into Shion even more to whisper into his ear. "I think it's so obvious that even you will understand."

Evidently, it wasn't just Nezumi teasing Shion because Shion definitely felt Nezumi's own little member at stark attention as a shudder ran down his spine, inadvertently causing him to wiggle against the other man's groin. He had to smile. So Nezumi was attracted to him too. At least that leveled out the playing field a little bit.

"I just wanna... try something out," Nezumi added.

Shion hummed absently in response, not really taking in the severity of the situation he was in. He was shocked right back into reality when he felt Nezumi's hand wrap around his length though. He sucked in a sharp breath. Shit. This was too fast! This wasn't how this was supposed to be happening! But it did feel good... _really_ good.

"Nghh," Shion moaned breathlessly. Especially when Nezumi did that.

"Hah," Shion panted. And that!

He turned his face so that his cheek rested against the cool wall. That was exactly what he needed, a bit of coolness to level his head. He was heating up like the fucking sun. Nezumi nuzzled into Shion's neck and tentatively kneaded a patch of skin between his teeth as he sucked it lightly. Shion couldn't help but to moan, especially when he felt a tiny little buck from Nezumi's end against his backside. That action did remind him of how this situation was _going_ and how he _wanted it to go_.

"Nezumi," he breathed, cracking an eye and peering at the other man expectantly. Nezumi simply grunted lightly in response. "You too," Shion said, bucking back but pulling one hand off the wall to grab Nezumi's hand and stop his quickening work. That wasn't _exactly_ what he had meant to say, as his better judgement was advising him to cease and desist... but it would work.

Nezumi lifted his head from the crook of Shion's neck to look at the man better. "Shion," he said, "I'm not rubbing my bare self against your rough jeans."

"Then move them out of the way," Shion suggested in a low voice that he hoped would come off as sexy. He wanted Nezumi to feel about him as strongly as he felt about Nezumi.

Nezumi's eye brows slowly rose in surprise. "Move them?" he repeated questioningly. Shion nodded and Nezumi pursed his lips as he analyzed the situation. "Aren't you afraid that I might... I don't know... stick it in without your permission?" Nezumi asked, cocking one inquisitive brow.

Shion's expression belayed just how absurd he thought such an insinuation was. "No," he answered automatically. Although, in retrospect, he thought that maybe he actually was a bit scared. Nezumi was kind of frightening like that sometimes, but Shion knew that, deep down, Nezumi would never do something like that. "I trust you," Shion assured, "and I trust that, even if you did that, you wouldn't hurt me."

Now Nezumi was just staring, causing Shion to feel self-conscious. Instead of allowing himself to get flustered and nervous, he chose to, instead, take the reins. He turned around so that his back now rested against the wall. Nezumi lifted his hands to place them on either side of Shion's shoulders, continuing to simply gaze at the man. Looking into those eyes, Shion could see something sparkling, something that seemed out of place, something that didn't fit the situation at all. He almost got the feeling that he had intruded, that taking the control from Nezumi had broken some unwritten rule.

"Should I take this off?" Shion asked quietly, tugging at the hem of Nezumi's shirt.

Nezumi shrugged. "Whatever you want," he said at barely more than a whisper, and that little spark that didn't belong grew.

Shion gazed for a moment longer, looking for a better answer in Nezumi's eyes. Why couldn't Nezumi just be more direct like he always was? Well, he did say whatever Shion wanted... and Shion wanted to see his skin, to feel it, to kiss it, to taste it. So, yeah, that shirt was coming off. When it did though, that spark that didn't belong grew in intensity. Nezumi resumed his previous position of leaning both hands on either side of Shion and continued to simply watch the man in silence.

Surprisingly, Shion didn't feel as nervous as he thought that he should under such an intense stare. Normally, he felt like an actor struggling to remember his lines if Nezumi stared at him for too long like this. That was not the case this time though. It was as if these actions were burned into his muscle memory long ago, as if it was natural to be so close to Nezumi like this. Hell, he had even forgotten that it was his _first time_ doing something like this with anyone... ever! But there was no time for being bashful.

Blindly, as he was so preoccupied with returning Nezumi's gaze, he found the button of Nezumi's jeans. Wishing to recreate the same tension that Nezumi had created for him, Shion slowly unbuttoned and unzipped the pants and then tugged them down to mid-thigh. He was just about to return some of that good feeling to Nezumi, but he suddenly stopped instead. Nezumi's face gave way to nothing that he was feeling, and that was what made Shion halt. There was only that little hint at something out of place in his eyes, but Shion didn't know what that was or what it meant.

This wasn't right. That much he felt to be true. This wasn't love, was it? If it was, then Shion couldn't tell. He loved Nezumi. He already knew that much. How could he go on without understanding how Nezumi felt too though? How could he treat this as just some fleeting encounter that they could forget tomorrow? How could he touch Nezumi in such a dishonest way? It felt as if he was defiling Nezumi himself. He was just like all of those men who sought Nezumi out for less than honorable reasons. He withdrew his hands completely, holding them safely against his chest, and his face became very hard. Nezumi finally showed some emotion then. His eye brow twitched and he frowned. Shion looked away though, unsure of what to do or say or feel anymore.

"What's wrong?" Nezumi asked.

Shion's face only grew more serious. "I don't know why we're doing this," he said.

Nezumi snorted. He grabbed Shion firmly by the hips and abruptly thrust himself against the other man. Instantly, Shion crumbled at the contact. His netherlands came right back to life again. He had to grip onto Nezumi's sides tightly as an anchor and his forehead found its way to the crook of Nezumi's neck for support.

"Because it feels _good_," Nezumi answered huskily.

Shion whimpered as Nezumi thrust against him again. "N-N-Nezumi," he breathed out. "W-Wait," he protested weakly. Nezumi paid him no mind and thrust again. The pleasure was wonderful... _too_ wonderful, and that was what eventually prompted Shion to speak up again. How could they do this? Nezumi hadn't even _kissed_ Shion! He just dived right in head first! Shion truly _loved_ Nezumi, but what about Nezumi? No. This was wrong... so wrong... "Wrong!" Shion exclaimed, as that single word was the only snippet of his thoughts that he could spit out in the midst of such pleasure.

Nezumi paused, as the tone of Shion's voice was quite disconcerting. Shion gripped Nezumi's sides tightly as he fought back tears. "Why is my chest aching so much?" he choked out. "Is it because this is so meaningless, and yet it feels like I've been waiting my whole life for it? Is it because the pleasure is so empty and hollow? Because it's fake?" Shion labored a few heavy breaths in pausing. "Nezumi, am I... just... a replacement?" he croaked out, afraid of the words and the answer that they could possibly herald, an answer that could shatter him into a billion pieces.

"No," Nezumi answered immediately. The word carried conviction, and Shion wanted to be convinced. But he was still so confused.

"Then what am I?" Shion asked, lifting his head and gently pushing Nezumi back enough so that they could look into each other's eyes again. "Am I... a shameful act that you'll regret in the morning?"

"No," Nezumi answered again. Though he responded just as quickly, the conviction had waned. That little spark that didn't belong seemed to grow even more. What was that spark? What was _Shion_ to Nezumi? Was he truly just a shameful act to be forgotten? Nezumi seemed to be able to read the troubled look in Shion's eye well, for his own eyes grew uncharacteristically soft. "That's not what you are," he assured.

Shion wanted to believe it. It didn't sound believable though. "I... I wouldn't be able to handle it, Nezumi, if it was that way," he murmured. "This is real to me, but if I'm just your toy to—"

"Shut _up_!" Nezumi demanded loudly, though his eyes held no anger at all. "Just shut up, Shion. You talk so much."

Shion's eyes sparkled with tears. He couldn't read Nezumi's mood so easily right now, but those words were hurtful no matter what. "Why would you _say_ that to me as I'm pouring my heart out?!" he exclaimed. "Nezumi, this normally counts as a love confession! Don't be so cruel!"

"I don't understand why you stopped me for this," Nezumi said. "I thought you already trusted that I wouldn't hurt you, Shion. What kind of words do you need from me?"

Shion huffed in exasperation. He was dealing with an asshole! The guy literally just asked what he had to say in order to keep going. So, what? He'd say anything for his own selfish pleasure? Was that it?! How could Shion love this jerk?! "If I tell you, then it doesn't even mean anything, does it?" Shion replied miserably, looking away and fighting oncoming sobs.

Nezumi sighed lightly. He lifted one hand to lightly guide Shion's face by the chin until they were locking eyes once more. This time, something honest was shining deep within the depths of Nezumi's gaze. He did little to hide what he was truly feeling this time around. "Sh-Shion," Nezumi mumbled uneasily. It was soft and shaky, possibly the beginning of his very own confession. A pained expression flickered across his face, followed by something akin to an apology. And then Shion suddenly understood. Nezumi was afraid.

He was afraid of his actions and of how they would define him. He was afraid of the way that Shion reacted to him and of the way that he reacted back, and of what all that meant. After all, it wasn't so easy to be like this with another man. Nezumi was fairly open-minded, but this was a bit deeper than a free spirit. Shion understood first hand what it was like to truly go through these feelings. It had taken him weeks to acclimate to the idea that he actually loved Nezumi the way that he had already decided he did. Now Nezumi was having to go through the same process and filter through the same intimidating emotions. And what was Shion doing to help? He was just acting selfishly, conveniently forgetting how nerve-wrecking this situation could be. Nezumi just didn't know _what_ to do. It was easier to act than to think.

"Does going quickly make it less intimidating?" Shion asked. Nezumi's eyes flashed with that little something that didn't belong again. That was a yes. Shion smiled gently, attempting to be encouraging. "It's okay, Nezumi," he assured. After a moment, he asked, "Is it okay... if I touch you?"

Stiffly, Nezumi nodded his head, though Shion knew it must have been a difficult thing to agree to. Nezumi probably felt more at ease when he was in control. The moment that Shion stepped forward, though, Nezumi was thrown out of his element.

Slowly, so as not to startle Nezumi, Shion trailed one of his hands down toward Nezumi's length. He took hold of it loosely and began pumping. It wasn't completely flaccid, which was obviously a good thing. It meant that Nezumi had responded to the experience on his own. Though, Shion was already aware of that, considering he'd felt it poking him in the back when it was much harder. Nezumi must have lost some of that desire when Shion forced such a serious conversation on him. Now, Shion's focus was just to enhance the experience further for Nezumi, even if, in reality, _he_ was the one who'd never done anything like this before. Realistically, _Nezumi_ should have been coddling _him._ But that wasn't the case and there was no point dwelling on it. He had more important things to worry about, like how his technique was being received.

"How do you like it?" he asked softly. And, for once, he saw Nezumi blush, and a furious blush it was.

Flustered and embarrassed, Nezumi buried his face in Shion's shoulder. "I-I don't know!" he blurted out. When Shion flicked his wrist once he reached the head though, Nezumi bucked his hips and groaned lightly. That was all the affirmation that Shion needed.

"Do you like that?" Shion asked as he repeated the action again.

"Nghh," Nezumi groaned again. "T-Tighter," he mumbled shyly.

"Like this?" Shion asked, tightening his grip.

Nezumi's breath hitched. "Y-Yeah," he stuttered.

"Or do you mean tighter only around the head?" Shion asked, giving a demonstration. "Or do you prefer—"

"Shion!" Nezumi exclaimed breathlessly, cutting the man off. "I-It's fine," he said.

Shion snaked one arm around Nezumi's waist and pulled him forward so that their hips were closer. Forced to stand more upright, Nezumi lifted his head from Shion's shoulder and rested his forehead against the wall. The hand on the other side of Shion's head found purchase in Shion's hair, gripping it tightly.

Shion bit his lip and turned slightly toward Nezumi so that he could better speak into the man's ear. "Do you prefer me like this?" he asked. "Or should I turn back around?"

"Wh-What do you prefer?" Nezumi asked.

"I like us touching like this," Shion answered, suddenly grabbing hold of his own erection too and rubbing them both together. "—but I want to please you," he added in a breathless murmur.

"Ngghh," Nezumi moaned, involuntarily flattening his chest even more against Shion and groaning more desperately. "F-Fuck," he panted.

He had never experienced such a sensation before, and it was beyond his imagination. Something so illicit as touching his groin against Shion's in the bare flesh like this seemed wrong on some level, and yet so undeniably right. Shion was doing a fantastic job at coaxing Nezumi out of his worrisome fear and back into his typical persona, who wouldn't be so concerned about such trivial things or confined to such a narrow box. Wasn't it right if it _felt_ right? Didn't his feelings for Shion matter and not what sat between his legs? These were things that Nezumi's typical self would think. This situation seemed more fragile though. For some reason, it wasn't that simple. He wasn't sure exactly _why_, but that thing hanging between Shion's legs was like a mental road block to Nezumi... even if it caused him so much goddamn pleasure.

"Nggghhh," Nezumi moaned loudly, allowing himself to get lost in the sensations flooding his brain.

That was, of course, until he felt Shion's tongue against the skin of his neck. Once he was able to process that sensation, he eventually decided that he liked it. However, he was also uncomfortable with it. But if it was just a little lick of love, then he guessed it was fine. When Shion took to sucking the flesh there instead of simply licking it, though, Nezumi's courage began to fail him. He decided that he liked the sensation far too much, so much that it was unnerving.

He wasn't ready for such intimacy. The more detached the situation was, the better. He was still learning how to do this with another man and be okay with the fact that it was _another man_ though, and especially if that man was Shion. Being open-minded was one thing, but this completely surpassed that. It was a whole other deal when it was _your life_ and _your genitalia_ involved in said open-mindedness. It wasn't like he was opposed though, not to the sex or to Shion. Nezumi was just... scared.

Unable to cope with such closeness so quickly, Nezumi abruptly pulled away and flipped Shion back around. Without qualm, Shion reassumed his original position with his palms flat on the wall. He looked coyly back at Nezumi over his shoulder. Nezumi only held his gaze for a second before he took to staring uncertainly down at Shion's presented ass though. Shion could see worry written all over his partner's face.

"Just rub it in between them," he instructed quietly. "Don't be shy."

Nezumi's face flushed of all color and then turned bright red. He glanced up at Shion, only to see the man smiling encouragingly at him. Faced with a smile like that, Nezumi could do nothing but smile back. His eyes traveled down Shion's back along the red snake to rest once again on his rear end, and this time he could appreciate what he saw. Shion was definitely attractive. That much was for sure. Nezumi _wanted_ the other man... badly. Facing that fact on an emotional level was scary though. Slowly, his features began melding back into a worried expression as such daunting thoughts flooded him.

"Nezumi," Shion called out softly. Nezumi snapped his eyes back up to Shion's face. He wasn't smiling anymore, but his gaze was soft and still held a great deal of reassuring encouragement. "It's okay," he said, nodding his head slightly. And Nezumi felt as if Shion truly did understand in that moment. He was reassuring Nezumi of something deeper, of something that went farther than just this one lewd act. Yes, Shion was right. It was okay. It was fine. It was _fine_.

Getting into the right frame of mind, Nezumi licked his lips and did as he was instructed. Gently, he rested his throbbing length in between Shion's cheeks. He squeezed them together slightly and then thrust forward. He couldn't help but to moan. Even Shion panted, and so Nezumi was motivated to do it again... and again... and again. Eventually, after quite a few tentative thrusts, Nezumi leaned over Shion to rest his forehead on the boy's shoulder and asked, "Is it okay this way?"

"Nghh," Shion moaned. "I like to hear you breathe like that. I like feeling your breath on my skin."

Nezumi responded with a moan of his own and thrust more boldly. "But... do you like it this way too?" he reiterated.

Shion nodded. "Somehow... it feels really... good... for me too," he answered. "It really turns me on," he admitted.

"Good," Nezumi breathed. He squeezed Shion's cheeks together more tightly and began to thrust with even more fervor. After a few spirited thrusts, one of his hands moved around to explore Shion's chest. It found its way to a nipple and tweaked it experimentally, earning him an appreciative whimper. "I like hearing you sound like that," he said, turning his head to better see Shion's flustered face. "It really turns me on," he admitted. He tweaked the nipple again and Shion whimpered more earnestly.

"Nezuumi," Shion moaned. "T-Touch me too," he said as more of a question than anything. He didn't want to push the situation too far past Nezumi's comfort level... but he needed attention too.

Without a second thought, though, Nezumi complied. He kept one hand on Shion's hip to steady his movements and moved the other from its place on Shion's chest down to his neglected length. He began working Shion in time with his thrusts. Many shared moans and groans later, the pace had doubled... then tripled... and then even quadrupled, and both men were nearing their peaks.

"S-Say my... name," Nezumi requested breathlessly.

"Nezumi!" Shion howled without hesitation. "Nghh! N-Nez-zumi!"

Nezumi grunted desperately. "Sh-Shion!"

And, as if it were orchestrated by some sex god, they shared a strong release, each crying out the other's name. Nezumi wrapped one arm firmly around Shion's waist and hugged the man tightly as he extracted the last drops of Shion's seed, thrusting lazily to do the same for himself. Shion trailed his fingers lightly along Nezumi's arm as they came down from their high.

Eventually, Nezumi stopped moving and let Shion's manhood go in favor of hugging him around the waist with both arms. Pulling Shion along too, he stood upright and buried his face in Shion's neck. "Shion..." he began quietly.

After a long pause, Shion finally asked softly, "Yes, Nezumi?"

Nezumi lifted his arms to hug Shion around the chest instead, squeezing tightly. "I-I..." He paused for a short moment before sighing heavily. He turned his head to the side away from Shion so that his cheek was resting against the man's shoulder.

He spotted a towel and decidedly disengaged to retrieve it. When he turned to face Shion again, he ignored the confused look of bewilderment on his face and went about cleaning Shion's back off in silence. He then turned Shion around to face him, intending to clean his front off as well, but he found himself frozen still. Instead, he quickly cleaned himself off and pulled his pants and boxers up, which were luckily still clean. He glanced at Shion's still confused face and tossed the towel at him.

Shion fumbled to catch the towel and then paused for a moment, studying Nezumi's body language intently. He wasn't good at deciphering those kinds of things like Nezumi was though, so he didn't really understand what Nezumi was feeling at all. He was clearly trying to tell Shion something, something that he was afraid to just say, but Shion didn't know what that was. He decided that the best approach was just to wait patiently, for pestering Nezumi _never_ provided good results.

Once Shion had finished cleaning himself off, Nezumi snatched the soiled towel from him without warning. Instead of taking offense to Nezumi's rash action, not that Shion wasn't already used to that sort of behavior from Nezumi anyway, Shion just attributed it to the situation at hand. Sure, Nezumi could stand to be a bit _nicer_ and _gentler_ after what they'd just shared, but Shion supposed that what they had just shared was what had Nezumi so on edge to begin with. Being on edge always made Nezumi more brash, so Shion was able to be understanding.

While Nezumi busied himself with taking his time to cross the small room and toss the towel in the dirty laundry, Shion pulled up his pants and boxers. Covering up his manly parts would probably make Nezumi feel more at ease too. When Nezumi returned to stand in front Shion once more, he took up a firm, steady stance and stared resolutely into Shion's eyes. Shion gazed back softly, doing his best to give off an unimposing aura. Whatever Nezumi was working up the nerve to do or say, Shion didn't want to make it any more difficult. He knew that Nezumi would be more at ease if he just waited quietly. Plus, he knew that Nezumi preferred him to be meek like this in general anyway; and he didn't mind, as it was in his nature.

Nezumi didn't really like it when people were too imposing, as he had such a strong personality himself. He hated feeling challenged, but that probably had a lot to do with the fact that he was forced into independence at a young age. Shion had always been sheltered and protected though. He never had to form a hard exterior like Nezumi. Even if he put on the display of an exterior that made it seem as if he was entirely unfazed by people, Nezumi was actually pretty sensitive to those around him. When Shion was subdued, Nezumi would be subdued too. If Shion got worked up, then Nezumi would get worked up as well. He was constantly adapting to his surroundings, unable to be off guard at any moment—even with Shion and even if he tried really hard to maintain a composure that would hide that tendency.

After a short while of them simply staring at each other that way, Shion began to feel like he was getting the silent message. Though his heart was aching a bit, he managed to smile at Nezumi. It seemed as if that smile was exactly what Nezumi needed, as it prompted him to relax. He heaved a heavy sigh and released the tension in his muscles, leaning forward to rest his forehead gently against Shion's. Shion closed his eyes and simply reveled in the sensation of feeling Nezumi's skin against his own again. This time, it was in a much more innocent way, though it felt just as rewarding. After a moment, Nezumi took in a deep breath and Shion knew that he was finally going to speak.

But he didn't have to. Shion understood. He wrapped his arms loosely around Nezumi's waist, causing the other's words to catch in his throat once more. He could feel the uneasiness begin to radiate off of Nezumi again, but he was unwilling to release the man just yet. He pulled Nezumi into a tight embrace, causing their chests to flatten against each other completely.

"It's okay," he said softly.

Nezumi was grateful for the sentiment. Shion's inclination to reassure was actually something that Nezumi really appreciated. Shion seemed to only say it when Nezumi really needed to hear it. Yes. It was okay. It was _okay_. He could do this.

"It's okay for me to love you on my own," Shion went on, continuing a train of thought that Nezumi had presumed finished. Nezumi huffed out a breath, as those words had taken him completely off guard. "At least this one night was enough for me," Shion continued, squeezing Nezumi tighter. "Even if you had told me that you felt nothing _before_ we did this, I still would have been selfish and done it anyway. You don't have to love me though, Nezumi," he whispered, "and it'll still be okay." He paused for a moment and sucked in a shaky breath as he fought back his tears. He had just assured Nezumi that it was okay, after all. He couldn't very well start to cry now. "I love you enough for the both of us," he finished.

Slowly, Nezumi began to reciprocate the hug. "Shion," he whispered.

Every doubt, every fear, every single thing that had kept him from speaking his feelings in the beginning was erased. Knowing this selfless man had changed Nezumi entirely. From the day that they had met, Nezumi had been changed. This was just a clueless simpleton from No. 6, and yet Nezumi found himself striving to be just like him. This was a guy who would give the clothes off of his own back to help someone else in need, even if it killed him in the end. This was a truly strong man, stronger than Nezumi had ever been. There was a strength in kindness that was unbeatable. It did not matter how many men Nezumi could take down with his knife, because it only took one, simple-minded fool like Shion to bring him to shambles.

No, not a fool. A genius. Yes, Shion was a genius. Not only because of those tests that told him so, but because of the purity of his heart. He refused to lose that purity, that sweet kindness. Only a fool would throw away his humanity, but Shion was not a fool. Shion clung to his humanity. He clung to it fiercely. Only when Nezumi was involved did it ever escape Shion, and that was what Nezumi hated. He was changing Shion. Shion had already come too close to killing men for Nezumi's sake. If Nezumi could be more like Shion though, then Nezumi wouldn't put them in situations like that anymore. Then things would be better, wouldn't they? Yes, they would be better. They were already better just by being in this man's presence. So Shion was Nezumi's kryptonite, but there was nothing wrong with that. It felt okay. It _was_ okay. It was _right_.

"I love you, Shion." The words were smooth on his tongue. And, dear god, they felt so fucking good. "I really love you."

When Shion clutched him tighter, when he felt Shion's tears wetting his shoulder, when he felt his own heart begin to flutter and his own fingers begin to tremble, Nezumi was not afraid to let his emotions show too. The emotions were overwhelming, and all he could think to do was to cry along with Shion. They weren't tears of despair though, so they were okay. It was okay to cry with Shion like this because it felt like, in this moment, they were finally uniting as one.

This was it. This was everything. Nezumi would be a changed man. He would be _Shion's_ man. That must have been how it was always meant to be... and that was a beautiful thing, the most beautiful thing that ever was.


	2. Found The Chocolate

**A/N:** This is just a small, little diddly added on for what happened to the chocolate. One of my reviewers, AhikuBoruchi, mentioned their curiosity about what had happened to Shion's gift after they got carried away with other activities XD And since we're talking about reviewers, I want to extend a huge thank you to everyone who took the time to write a review! I always mean to reply to each review, but I am just idek these days. But I really do appreciate you all! And that includes those who have followed and favorited the story as well!

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Shion's eyelids, having drooped dangerously low, opened back up as Nezumi sighed. Shion shifted ever so slightly in response, positioning his head a little closer to Nezumi's heart.

"Sorry," Nezumi murmured, interpreting the shift as if he'd disturbed Shion, since Shion hadn't moved for the past 10 minutes and Nezumi had assumed Shion was asleep.

Shion hummed softly. "S'fine," he murmured back. "M'not sleeping anyway." Although, that sleepy voice was doing nothing to convince Nezumi so.

Nezumi snorted softly with amusement. "Sure you weren't," he said sarcastically.

Shion snorted lightly as well, though his body was so tired by now that it was barely even able to create laughter. He began to relax again when he felt Nezumi's hand sifting through his hair.

All the tension from before had been almost completely eradicated, and for that Shion was grateful. Once their tears had dried up, though, Nezumi had sort of shifted back into that uncertain persona. But Shion wasn't expecting acceptance so quickly anyway, so he was glad that Nezumi hadn't retreated entirely. As it was, Shion was glad that Nezumi was even comfortable enough to lay together this way. They probably wouldn't be executing anymore explicit activities for quite some time yet, but that didn't bother Shion at all. As long as he knew they would be taking proactive steps forward from now on, he was happy.

Sex wasn't even important to Shion, really. Of course, now that he'd had a taste, he would never be able to forget it and he, certainly, would never stop craving it altogether. But he was confident that he would be able to focus on taking his sweet time to make Nezumi comfortable before worry of the chaste days ahead driving him insane began to surface, as he knew it eventually, and inevitably, would. He truly loved Nezumi though, and he wanted Nezumi to feel comfortable in feeling the same way. So, for now, cuddling was plenty good enough.

Shion's eyes began to droop sleepily again as a thought crossed his mind. "Y'know what would make this better?"

"Chocolate?" Nezumi supplied, practically reading Shion's mind.

"Yeah, actually," Shion replied, the sleepy tone lifting slightly. "Where did I put that?"

"I don't know." Nezumi turned his head to look out across the bedroom, since Shion was on his left side and, thus, facing inward toward the wall. "I don't see it anywhere in plain sight."

Shion sighed and shifted as if to move away, but Nezumi tightened the arm wrapped around his waist. "Don't worry about it," he said quickly, clearly not wanting Shion to stir.

Shion paused, thinking about whether he'd move or not. He wanted the chocolate... but... He looked up to meet Nezumi's eyes, and he could see what Nezumi was truly trying to say.

_Just stay here with me. Don't leave my side._

Shion smiled and nodded. "It'll be around just the same tomorrow."

Nezumi smiled back and nodded as well. "Right."

So Shion snuggled closer and settled back into a comfortable position near the calming beat of Nezumi's heart as Nezumi resumed his careful treatment of Shion's hair. And as the room grew quiet once more, three little, mischievous mice did their best to not squeak too loud, lest they alert the sleepy men on the bed. It wouldn't do, after all, to give themselves away, not when they were sneakily devouring one of Shion's latest treasures.

When Nezumi resumed scanning the room again, though, once Shion had almost certainly fallen asleep, they were caught red-handed. Nezumi honed in on their little forms huddled in the corner, almost hidden by a bookcase but not quite. They each looked up in succession at the heated glare they felt in their direction and squeaked in alarm, scampering away and leaving a nearly empty wrapper labeled as the dark chocolate behind.

Once the squeaks disappeared and Nezumi was sure that the mice had fled from the room entirely, he scanned the surrounding area to find that the other two packs of chocolate were safely stored near the burner. The mice could, of course, get to the them if they were determined enough, as they had obviously done with the dark chocolate, but Nezumi had a feeling that they wouldn't even try. And so it was with that peace of mind that he was able to close his eyes and fully enjoy the warmth at his side enough to fall into the deepest and most restful sleep he may have ever had.


End file.
